“Where did you see love growing up”
My answer was that I didn’t see it, with that question I went straight to thinking about love as far as a relationship goes. It really had me thinking about how I did not have any strong marriages or relationships to look up to or to mock for my own relationship! This is really a sad situation for a person who is so loving, emotional and always wanted to have a family. It makes me think how do I really know how to love in a relationship if I’ve never seen one! I mean I believe I know what it should look like but it’s not in front of me other than watching tv! And those relationships are made out to be perfect for example the Cosby’s or the Winslow’s (Family Matter) just to name a few.
The only people in my family who have been married a long time were like great aunts and I wasn’t around them enough to see their relationship. But they did come from an era where people actually tried to stay in a marriage. Now a days people give up with out a fight and are on to the next.
Then it dawned on me that love is not only shown in relationships and I was totally thinking of the question in the wrong way! I had love ALL around me! I mean if you follow my blog then you have read about the bonus mothers and dads all the family I have. My mother and grandmother show me soooo much love how could I not have mentioned that love? It takes a lot for a person to take in an child who’s not theirs THATS LOVE! My mother never met a stranger and will stop to help any one in need, I’ve seen her pull people out of flipped cars, give a man her jacket who just walked out a burning house even though it was cold outsideTHATS LOVE!!!
So to answer my own question how can I love in a relationship if I’ve never seen a healthy one is: I love selflessly like the love I was given, I love hard, I understand that persons background to understand their current, I communicate, I be honest not only to myself but to them, I be open, and I be consistent!!!
Where did you see love growing up?? Please share below
2 comments:
This question came up 6 years ago for me and it was a tough one. I wasn't surrounded by any married couples or even strong relationships. I began to think about my family and my parents aren't the show love and affection type. I can count on one hand how many times my dad has said out loud I love you. However I'm a daddy's girl so him not saying doesn't change him being my favorite person, I thought about my parents upbringing and why they aren't affectionate. I also realized all the sacrifices they made for me and my siblings. So I had to think outside the box on that question too. I know without a doubt my parents love me without them being vocal about it. The biggest part for me was putting myself in their shoes to understand them better. I do make it a point to be affectionate with my own kids and it was really uncomfortable in the beginning but now it comes natural!
There are many ways to show love! It’s all about how we receive it and then give it back to the world! With understanding of ones last makes it easier! After reading love languages it helped me understand more! Sometimes we can’t always give love the way we expect to receive it
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